trying-

i feel like there's so much on my mind- yet when i sit down to collect my thoughts, it's a lot harder than it should be.

as i sit here with a sunburn, a sore body, and tired eyes- i must admit that the past few days have been incredible. i havent done a whole lot, which i have really enjoyed. since living in korea, i havent had a lot of alone time, which may sound absurd since i did live alone for a little bit before, and now totally live alone.. it just seems like i always tried to fill up my days and nights with people. i dont know if it was because i was afraid to be alone, or to do things alone.. but i dont think so. i mean, i am not a loner by any means, but i also thoroughly enjoy being alone. it's something that i mourned this summer. i missed my alone time, especially while i was at home. growing up, i was the kid that after dinner, i would lock myself in my room, and you generally didnt see me again until morning.. or maybe you would see me brushing my teeth before going to sleep. it's amazing how much of that still lives in me, and how much of me longs for that time to myself.

i am happy that i made the decision to do nothing over the holiday. it's been great doing whatever i feel inclined to do. selfishly, it's been amazing not having to worry about other people's desires, or schedules. i wake up each morning and think 'what do i want to do today?'... it reminds me of my month in new zealand alone. traveling to new zealand was basically the first thing i have ever done alone.. especially when i decided to stay after the class was over. it was so exhilarating. and i guess the past few days have just reminded me of that.

this summer, and coming back to korea have been great. but to be honest- i have been so exhausted- physically.. emotionally.. spiritually. i have had this internal battle going on and i wasnt able to find any real time to deal with it. thankfully, after these past few days, i feel more at peace, internally. i am not as physically tired, and my health has finally recovered. thank the good Lord!

i feel like there is so much i want to share- yet not. i listened to a couple absolutely amazing sermons this weekend. they caused me to really take a look at life. my life. and it has been really good. i have been thinking a lot about my future lately and what that might look like. i have spent a lot of time on the phone with people who are not in korea. it has been amazing. technology is such an amazing thing.

that's all for now. i realise this was kind of vague, but that is ok. there will be plenty more to come.

His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness
through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.
~2 Peter 1:3